My Feelings About Generosity – Part 1

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Feelings I Felt

I remember years before the accident finding it so hard to allow others to help me and to accept help from others. Having lived a life of independence for so many years I was absolutely tainted with the brush strokes of willful pride. I would persist to show myself and others that I could do things by myself, not accepting help from others (and quite competently, I might add). Like many people I struggled with the emotion of internal guilt. I always felt guilty accepting help from others and felt that I should pay it back two-fold to a person for their troubles and effort. This then made me less likely to accept the help given because it would require more effort to eventually even the score. Now, as I look back on what I have learned, I can see what a fool I was. Isn’t it funny how humans sort things through in their heads in such a ridiculous way? I know this is a common theme among many people,  specially those who are the most generous, caring and helpful to others themselves.

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